Things I already started worrying about.
Why worry later if you can start worrying now. Sooner is better. I got up an hour early so I can worry more (Not! I did not actually get up an hour early, but now I am catching up).
Somehow The One had a relatively easy going week. He was at home a lot more than usual. He took the children to school two mornings and it was fun. He picked them up from school two afternoons, one of them together with me, and it was fun. We even had one lunch together. I am telling you, I can get used to it, having him around so much, us together a lot, that it is fun.
Can you get used to having fun? All the time? Or almost all the time? This question sounds dumb, but when you get to think about it, it’s not.
Why do we have to live from one weekend to the next? Why isn’t every day Saturday!?
This post is going nowhere. Everything sounds so childish. Why is childish not good? I want to have fun all the time! I want us all to be together! Not wait all week long for Thursday, reading all the Facebook statuses about “Happy Thursday morning!” and “Wednesday is the new Thursday”. Because life passes by while we wait for Thursdays, which symbolizes the beginning of the weekends we are so much longing for.
He asked me this week, Tell me, what if while we’re away tripping, we will find that we do not enjoy being with the children? That the children keep nagging “I’m bored I’m bored” non-stop? That they are stuck with all these screens during the trip just as they were at home? That problems came with us instead of left waiting for us at home the way we intended them to be ?
I really wanted to say, Good stuff is one thing you get used to quickly and easily. You’ll see. All will be fine. When giving children an opportunity to develop in a natural way, they develop best. Our love will come with us anywhere. When it’s good for us, it’s good for them, and yada-yada.
But then I paused for a moment to cherish that this voice of him, is mine too. When he brings up and reflects these concerns, these are also my concerns, also my inner voice.
Usually it’s his job to echo out that worried inner voice and my job is to say that all will be fine. I am the optimistic, so to speak. So I leave aside relatively gently my role and say, Wow, it’s pretty scary make dreams come true.
